I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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