matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
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