I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
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