i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
