the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
