Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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