i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
