either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I need to align my fucking chakras
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
