I never want to see another naked old woman again.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Oh god it's open bar.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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