she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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