all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
