glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
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