Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
