And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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