grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
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