we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
