I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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