well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
