escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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