She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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