I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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