shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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