Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
