Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
