I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
