My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
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