Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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