i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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