the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
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