Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
