i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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