What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Randomize
