I wish i was in the wii world.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Randomize
