doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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