Don't you send me to vm
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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