She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
