okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
