38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
