great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Randomize
