if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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