his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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