At least make sure they are 18
Why
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
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