so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize