It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
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