i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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