No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
