ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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