So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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