his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
