Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
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