Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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