were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I think I just sharted jello shots
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